Just Dead-Tired
Today had been a very very long day and I am just so brain-dead, emotionally tired and mentally tired now. Every quarter, I have to plan the Volunteer Management meeting and this can be a very very stressful and it is no different this time thought everything eventually turned out well.
Trying Something New
This is the first time I tried to conduct my meeting in a more dynamic and interactive manner. I played games like human bingo, blow wind blow, pasted posters of learning points everywhere in the meeting room, asked questions and gave out prizes, used creative training techniques e.g. writing a letter to self in future, cover story visioning exercise and time capsule, and used "ball-throw" to keep the energy level high. I also tried to create a comfy environment for all by allowing all to remove their shoes when they come in and played pachelbel as piped-in music for discussions and activities. This is so different from my previous style of conducting meetings, I can't believe that I managed to pull it off... and I think that explains why I am so mentally drained... since I have to be ra-ra all the time.
Lessons about Training
While planning for this meeting, I also realised how chiong hey (long winded) I can be... I planned the meeting and when I went through the slides with my boss yesterday, she commented that the meeting seems heavy based on what she saw in the presentation. I have done it yet again; I am always so gan jiong and want to pack as many things as possible, forgetting to note who my target audience is. A lesson learnt. I also learnt the importance of group dynamics and configuration. Twice in the meeting, I saw the effect of group configuration on the quality of discussion that results. For example, in one of the discussion which required participants to share about how volunteers have been engaged in their centres, I realised one group had all the new staff and they had relatively little to share. In another discussion, I realised all the quiet ones were placed together and this made discussion very difficult despite me trying to facilitate a few times. Another lesson learnt.
Dramatic Loss
So, by the end of the day, I was totally brain-dead and mentally exhausted. Just as I was about to leave my office, I got called into my boss' office and she shared with me that one of my fellow colleague will be leaving us. This is really so drama... a moment, this colleague was in the meeting talking about our vision for volunteer management for the next year, the next moment, I am told that this colleague will be leaving. And the circumstances surrounding this incident is just real shocking... things just happened so fast. By now, a lot of questions were going through my mind... I kept asking why this colleague of mine did what he did and can't help but feel how fragile things can sometimes be... you can be doing things very well but all it takes is just a small wrong step and there you have it... you are gone. I really felt that his ideology about volunteer management is so aligned with mine and he is so young but now, he is leaving... so today, I am not grieving two colleagues leaving me.
By the end of the day, I am just to brain-dead, too emotionally drained and mentally exhausted I just felt like doing nothing and just stone for the rest of the night... it has been a looonnnngg day.
posted by me at 6:46 PM
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