A Season of Giving Thanks

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Been away for quite a bit now... anyway, amidst life's struggles, I want to also find time to really give thanks for the little blessings I have received thus far in the last week.

My New Toy
First and foremost, I really want to thank God for my latest gadget, my new laptop :) I really thank God for having the ability to afford luxuries like my laptop. Frankly, I struggled for a while whether I should buy a laptop, since it is not really a necessity, rather a want... I no longer needed a laptop for work but since my laptop "departed", I have been feeling a little "disconnected" from cyberspace, and there were occasions I had to vie for the use of the computer with my sister. In fact, recently, I come to realize how reliant I am on technology, so when recently my handphone battery went flat, I ended up feeling very lost. I was going to meet a friend to go to the IT Show but his number is stored in my handphone. So I had to scout around for a phone card. When I failed to find one, I had to buy a sweet for some small change, so I can call another friend to get my friend's number. Boy was that an experience!


Well, I could have sent my laptop for repair but then, I really don't know what was wrong with it and it does look a little battered after 3 years of heavy usage... so, decided I would buy a new one instead... Got quite a good deal from the IT Show 2007. Boy am I glad I did not buy on impulse; the temptation to just flip out my card and make a purchase on-the-spot is so strong, especially when a guy is surrounded by so many gadgets and everything seem like a good deal. Managed to go back to do a bit of research before getting this new laptop the next day. I would say I am not regretting my purchase... $1499 for a Lenovo (Y300) 13 inch laptop with webcam, 1GB ram, relatively good graphic card, light-weight laptop with integrated DVD writer... it is all I have wanted in a portable workstation... now I am back in business with my new laptop :) And also, was attended by this sweet girl, hahaha... she seems like a nice person and my friend was like quite attracted by her sweet personality as well :) Too bad I am not the kind of bold person to ask someone for her number. Hehehehe...

Thank God for NSS because I just received a letter informing me that the government will be depositing about $500 for my NSS encashment into my account next month... wow, that would go t pay for 1/3 of my laptop... an unexpected surprise :)

Stitch-a-licious Monday
I think it is becoming quite a well-known fact at work that codfishy like Stitch; I am getting more and more Stitch gifts of all shapes and sizes from my colleagues. To date, I am amassing quite a collection of Stitch toys on my office table... But really, I thank God for wonderful colleagues and the very fact that I receive gifts from them really makes me feel good because I feel remembered. I do sometimes feel guilty because I seldom buy gifts for friends.

The latest addition to my Stitch "museum" @ work is a gift from my guardian angel - a Stitch plush toy speaker. What makes this gift even more special is the fact that it is from my guardian angel and she will be leaving her job in 3 weeks' time... I will really miss her. Anyway, I really like the little cute thing. It is now sitting on top of my computer looking at me and "singing" worship songs :) I think people cannot believe that a grown-up guy like me, would have so many Stitch-es on his table hahaha...


Weekend of Connections
Last weekend was a wonderful weekend.

Somehow, I seem to have gotten out of my "shell" a little bit and was talking to my cell group members and friends... After attending the cell leadership training last Saturday, I also seem to have more hope about leading cell and not have so much ill feelings about leading cell.

I also had a wonderful time connecting with a fellow cell leader-in-training as well. Somehow in the past, I find it difficult to find topics to talk to him about and we would usually be very quiet because both of us are introverts. But last Saturday, after the cell leadership training, I sat down for dinner with him and "connected" with him. It was a good chit-chat as we shared about our struggles being introverts and leading cell. Somehow, it was more powerful talking to someone like him about my struggles in leading cell; after all, he is also facing the same challenges and we can emphatise with one another better. I really thank God for the chat and for him, because I really did leave the dinner feeling more encouraged and ministered to. I do hope he felt the same way too.

Most importantly, I felt connected with God once again. It has been a horrible few weeks and I really could not sense God in my life... I could not understand why this was so and had yearned for that connection back with God... Maybe it is my walk, maybe it is me being a willful child who keeps sinning or maybe it could just be that I was too focused on cell leadership I am no longer enjoying cell discussions, worships etc. But anyway, I am starting to feel connected with God again and am asking him to deliver me from my sins and help me resist choosing to sin again.

Draw Me Close To You


Jesus the Same


Rescue


Also heard another nice song, Beautiful Saviour, but can't seem to find the song online :)

Blessings @ Work
I also thank God for blessing me at work. For some reason, work has slowed down considerably and I am no longer living each day like a "mad house" with so many things demanding my attention. This is something I have never experienced before... To a certain extent, it feels weird... It is not that I do not have anything to do (my to-do list still stands at 30-40) but I am given the luxury of time to sit and focus on one thing at a time.

In fact, at a point in time, I could not get use to this slower pace of work and wondered if indeed my work here is done, that it is time for me to move on... especially since I received a call last week asking if I would consider moving on to do direct social work again, this time with elderly. Anyway, I thought through it and had to decline because I just wasn't sure, somehow there is no peace to move on. But one thing, I want to thank God for the slower pace which has helped me to considerably slow down after burning out at work. The slower work pace also seem to come at the right time, since I am now given more time to plan for cell group discussions.

I also thank God for the opportunity to help out at an elderly feeding programme during one of the mornings last week. I really did enjoy myself seeing the elderly having fun with the volunteers' performance and being given food. I think this is also may have caused me to really consider if it is really time to move on. But anyway, will be staying for some time more to come since I have made a commitment to my boss that I will stay :)

Learning About Cell Leadership
I also thank God for teaching me about cell leadership over the past few weeks. I wasn't coping well and kind of felt quite negative about having to lead cell with great anxiety. But, I thank God for showing me, at a recent staff devotion, that it is not just the facilitator who is important in any discussion but also each member in contributing. I noticed this colleague, who seems to also be quite introverted as well, did not even have to try very hard but there was nonetheless an in-depth discussion. This made me feel less bad about silence at cell group discussions. At a recent cell group discussion, I also noticed that my cell leader also had challenges engaging the members in discussion, so I guess that I am not the only one having trouble. This also made me feel better about myself.

OK, 3 weeks more and I will be off to my first missons trip. Keep me in prayers for good health, manageable workload, for projects to go well during my absence, for protection over my family, for guidance, discernment and wisdom in preparation for the trip, for journey mercies and for God to be with the team while we travel.