Reunion with a Dear Friend

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by faylowship

Catching Up Over Briyani and Martabak
It has been some 8 months now since my last day at work at my ex-workplace. Last week, I called up my ex-colleague for a chat and we agreed to meet up for dinner with another friend today. Although it is just a simple dinner eating nasi briyani and martabak and most of the dinner was spent listening to my ex-colleague sharing about her ups and downs at work... it was nonetheless a nice evening catching up with her...


The Good O' Times
We just kept reminiscing the good o' times when we had to be squashed up in a small office, we laughed as we recollected how rocky our working relationship started, how we went for "project slim down" during lunch time and visited the gym everyday (but later stopped when we started to say "busy today, maybe tomorrow") to the time she came to know that I tendered my resignation and my last day at work. (Picture "Time" by obyvatel)

When Saying Goodbye is so Difficult
But one thing remain true... we both appreciate each other as colleagues and dear friends; we appreciate how we worked well together and we were genuine with each other, sharing with each other when we are upset with the other person. It was a wonderful "tag team" but it was sad that it had to end; but at least we were glad that we had met one another... parting was difficult on that fateful last day at work. In fact, as I was talking about the last day at work and recollected the scene where my colleague and I were closing the shuttle gate together for the last time, I could still feel a tinge of sorrow. I guess that scene will be deeply etched in memory for some time to come... (Picture "to say goodbye" by ticci)

I was so pleasantly surprised that this dear friend of mine noticed and remember little actions of mine e.g. when I took off my watch after sitting down at the dinner table, she would exclaim to her friend, "this is codfishy... taking his watch whenever he settles down to eat or work".

James 1:19
Today during staff devotion in the morning, we were discussing about being quick to anger and whether as Christians, this would be acceptable. Well, as you may have guessed it, it wasn't, despite whether Christian or non-Christian. But never would I expect that I would be angered several times during this very day...

I Don't Have to Take This!
The first, I felt rejected when I called someone to discuss a project only to have him ask another colleague to call me back to tell me that he is busy and want me to read the email he sent me (which I have read)... somehow he also seems to not be very keen about taking charge of the project and had even asked me to contact another colleague to discuss the details... To me, I took it rather personally that here I am calling you from HQ to discuss the project but you don't even want to speak with me... when in fact, this is not even my project, I am just helping to support the project. I was so so upset that I was tempted to write an email to his boss and my director to say how disappointed I was when I tried to support the project but receive no support whatsoever.

Suggestion: Think Twice
But ultimately, I am so glad I did not let my anger get the better of me... I recall a friend told me once that if you are angry and want to shoot an email to complain or get another person in trouble, think twice; draft it but do not send it, keep it in the draft folder, go home and come back to review it the next day before you send it. This really helps... well at least now, a few hours later, the urge to send that email is not that strong now although I am still rather upset by it.

You Are Ruining it All!
Second, I received news from the president of my ex-workplace that he has tendered in his resignation... so has another committee member who had been a pillar for some years now and also the vice president... apparently, it seems that they have all left because they just can't work with my ex-"acting" boss who I also had difficulty working with... Slowly but surely, she seems to be tearing the whole organization apart but does she know? I do not know how I should react to this, to be angry or just ignore... after all, I have put in quite a bit of effort in that place and in my project (together with the committee) and everything seems to be collapsing now...

I am challenged to be slow to become angry.

End of the Road
Had my first challenge of "firing" volunteers yesterday when I assigned a couple of volunteers to assist in a project. However, being rather young and jovial, they seem to be more suited for direct services rather than backend support work in an office environment; they were rather chatty and this disrupting my other colleagues' work, so much so they complained to me. I felt bad placing them in the wrong place although they did choose to do it.

At the end of the day, I was tasked to be the terminator but soon realized it wasn't easy at all... I thought it would be easy to be genuine and feedback to them that they had been disruptive but in the end, I just could not say it. It was just so difficult to say "no" with my character; do not want to hurt them. In the end, I just told them that there will not be any opportunities for them to help the next day... I felt real bad about the wrong placement and also bad that I was not as genuine as I would like to be with them... (Picture "The End" by Glen26)