You've Got Dilemma
About Relationship
"Beep Beep!" my handphone called out... I have just received a sms which I would never had expected to receive... It was from Z; that friend who "was beginning to hate me". His SMS caught me by surprise and I just became lost all of a sudden.
This time, it is nothing nasty, just a normal (or I hope it is normal) SMS asking me if I know someone in my friend's "wedding band of brothers" (which I had pulled out from because of my souring friendship with Z). I am so lost... a lot went through my mind:
Why did he message me? Is he trying to salvage the friendship? Is he genuine? Is he trying to salvage the friendship to make things less awkward when we meet at my friend's wedding dinner this Saturday? Is there a hidden agenda? Should I respond? Is this an opportunity to set things right? Can I let go?
I don't know, I really don't know... I have received a dilemma and just hate having to make this decision of whether to respond or not and what tone to take... I do not want to make the wrong choice only to regret it later... Ultimately, I tell myself I am still hurt but shouldn't I be offering forgiveness? Some of these life decisions are just that plain difficult to make...
About Work
Side-tracking a bit... I was kinda bored again at work and kinda dread going to work a little in the morning. I am not sure why I feel this way despite my current job almost seem perfect.
I was thinking about why I feel this way and maybe it is because I am used to working in a fast-paced environment. There is work here but somehow it is not urgent and I can afford to take my time to do things.
It might also be because I lack confidence and my current job requires me to meet people, call for meetings and coordinate large scale projects... I just hope this does not last too long... getting kind of worried whether it is normal for me to feel this way.
"Beep Beep!" my handphone called out... I have just received a sms which I would never had expected to receive... It was from Z; that friend who "was beginning to hate me". His SMS caught me by surprise and I just became lost all of a sudden.
This time, it is nothing nasty, just a normal (or I hope it is normal) SMS asking me if I know someone in my friend's "wedding band of brothers" (which I had pulled out from because of my souring friendship with Z). I am so lost... a lot went through my mind:
Why did he message me? Is he trying to salvage the friendship? Is he genuine? Is he trying to salvage the friendship to make things less awkward when we meet at my friend's wedding dinner this Saturday? Is there a hidden agenda? Should I respond? Is this an opportunity to set things right? Can I let go?
I don't know, I really don't know... I have received a dilemma and just hate having to make this decision of whether to respond or not and what tone to take... I do not want to make the wrong choice only to regret it later... Ultimately, I tell myself I am still hurt but shouldn't I be offering forgiveness? Some of these life decisions are just that plain difficult to make...
About Work
Side-tracking a bit... I was kinda bored again at work and kinda dread going to work a little in the morning. I am not sure why I feel this way despite my current job almost seem perfect.
I was thinking about why I feel this way and maybe it is because I am used to working in a fast-paced environment. There is work here but somehow it is not urgent and I can afford to take my time to do things.
It might also be because I lack confidence and my current job requires me to meet people, call for meetings and coordinate large scale projects... I just hope this does not last too long... getting kind of worried whether it is normal for me to feel this way.
posted by me at 9:10 PM
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