Don't Rock the Boat

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Sometimes, I can't help but feel that no matter how "stable" a relationship may seem, there is always the possibility of it going awry. Experienced that today...

canoe leaving (2) by joseboa

A Bad Remark
Was out happy cycling with my friend at East Coast and we were chit-chatting and checking something out at Funan when he suddenly made a remark which upsetted me a lot... we were walking and talking about a fellow friends' upcoming wedding and he jokingly mentioned that all who graduated from my JC are stupid... I went all quiet... I later told him that I was upset with the remark he made, especially since I had developed a strong sense of belonging to my college... He did apologize and mentioned that he meant it as a joke. I remained quiet and must have looked terribly upset. Just amazed how sudden this came about... a moment we can be having fun chit-chatting, the next moment...

Anyway, had the opportunity to sit down with him soon after for dinner and I shared why I reacted to his remark. Told him that I came from a low-ranking JC and that we are occasionally looked down by people for being at the lower rung of the ranking system. Though being from a low-ranking JC, we are basically still human beings, aren't we... not stupid beings... we are there maybe because we are relatively less academically inclined than others and not that we are stupid. I loved my JC because despite it being in the lower rung of the ranking system in the past, I enjoyed my brief stay in that colleged and had managed to build many memorable relationships with my classmates there; the culture was one which focused on care and service and I can really feel that in the college. I do not feel unnecesary pressure because the students don't need to live up to expectations of the JC to be competitive and maintain its high ranking...

Low-Ranking Schools = Worthless?
This reminded me why I was so against the school ranking system in the past. I felt that the system was really making the "better" schools better and the "bad" schools "worse off". Come on, realistically speaking, if you can "make it" academically, won't you naturally choose to go to a higher-ranking school? It thus becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy... the old school ranking system just streamlined all the academically inclined students to the better schools and in the end everyone says "see, indeed these schools are really quality schools... look at the results they produce". Aren't we all in the end taking the same "A" levels paper regardless which JC we were from? All have equal chances to obtaining a place in the university.

I have developed a love for my college because I am who I am today because of my JC... Yes, I wasn't academically inclined and my "A" levels wasn't filled with impressive "A" grades but then I developed strong work and learning ethics from the CCAs I joined in JC; I was at one point in time:

• Class Representative
• Treasurer of 2 CCAs
• Section Leader of CCA
  
• President of the Library
  

and I grew a lot from there.... My character also developed from the various tasks I undertook in these CCAs. I had dedicated teachers who helped us with our studies but what do these teachers get in return? Teachers, staff and students alike are all labelled "low grade beings" from "low-ranking institution". Fortunately, the school ranking is no longer in place.

Anyway, my views about the ranking system is not the issue here. You can definitely see how strongly I feel about this; I had even once scolded a friend who told me he was so ashamed being associated with such a low-ranking JC. I am just so upset how things can sometimes go wrong despite how strong a relationship can be. This being said, I am nonetheless glad that I clarified with my friend why I was so upset with his remark. After that, things seemed to normalize though I am still disappointed he made such a remark.

Double Dose of Coffee
Throughout today, he was also trying to find out what happened between me and that friend "who was beginning to hate me" that things had turned out so bad. I told him that I do not wish to talk about it because it is pointless to do so. I have moved on and just do not wish to revisit the whole thing. To be fair to both parties, I also do not wish to revisit the issue because I know I somehow will slip into the "he is at fault, ally me" mode. He respected my decision.

However, he really poor thing... say that even though this had happened, both me and that friend are still his lifelong friends... just that instead of going for 1 cup of coffee, eating 1 bowl of mee, he just have to go for 2 cups and 2 bowls since he has to meet us separately. What to do?

Relationships are about Decisions
Am now watching this local TV programme which helps people to look for their old friends, teachers etc. Today's episode is on a BGR in JC which has somehow gone wrong when the boy proposed to the girl (somehow the girl was not ready for it and was taken aback by it)... from there everything just went downhill and there were more quarrels between them.

Now, 22 years later, the girl would like to draw closure through the programme and apologize to the boy. Same here, everything was fine one moment and wrong the next (when the "ring" was dished out)...

It almost becomes clear to me that relationship is all about decisions - decisions that could either make relationships better or worse and decision whether to salvage a relationship when it goes wrong.

Healthy Lifestyle
Yeah, according to my exercise routine, today is a rest day. Nonetheless, I did a separate dumbbell routine:

• Dumbbell Lunges
• Iron Cross
• One-Arm Dumbbell Row
• Stiff-Legged Dumbbell Deadlift
• Straight-Arm Dumbbell Pullover
• Dumbbell Side Bend
• One-Arm Flat Bench Dumbbell Flye

Also went to East Coast to cycle for some 1.5 hours, had a good tan hehehe, nice to really cycle around in quiet quiet East Coast (something not possible on weekends since it will be terribly crowded and noisy). This suddenly made me realized that my "vacation" and free-and-easy life is coming to an end since I will be starting work next week. Sighhh...

Almost took the lift on my way home despite me deciding to take the stairs everyday.